How to Tell if a Collaborative Divorce Is Right for You

Collaborative divorce can facilitate an amicable agreement between divorcing spouses and help maintain civility as spouses move into uncharted territory, especially if they have children. It is often less expensive than a traditional litigated divorce and, because it is less acrimonious, sets the stage for continuing cooperation.

Collaborative divorce is growing in popularity

Collaborative divorce is available in New York and 34 other states, but it is not right for everyone. There are several questions you can ask yourself to tell if collaborative divorce is right for you and your spouse.

  • Are you willing to compromise? For a collaborative divorce process to reach a successful conclusion, you must be able to come to the negotiating table with an open mind and at least consider compromising in every aspect of your divorce.
  • Are you intimidated by your spouse, or vice versa? The basic premise of collaborative divorce is recognizing each other as equal human beings with the mutual goal of disentangling your marriage relationship fairly and congenially. This prerequisite can’t exist in a situation in which one spouse feels bullied.
  • Have you given up hope of reconciling with your spouse? If you are still holding out hope that your spouse will reconsider, you can’t be fully committed to the collaborative divorce process. Your role in negotiations will be skewed by your emotions.
  • Is your spouse on board? This is the ultimate factor in deciding if collaborative divorce can work for you. It doesn’t matter how much you want to reach an amicable solution — it won’t work if your spouse is not willing to participate in good faith in the process.

The collaborative divorce process offers an array of benefits for couples who can put aside their painful emotions and work together toward a fair resolution. To discover if a collaborative divorce is a good fit for you, contact an experienced family law attorney in Westchester or Putnam counties to discuss your situation.  By: Lauren B. Abramson

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